I recently put a question out there asking for a one-word answer to what grief means to you. My intention for this was to remind all of us how differently we walk through grief, and what grief looks like for each of us uniquely. I received over 1000 responses, and it looked a little like this…
Grief is life changing and feels overwhelming, never ending, painful, sad, lonely, heavy and leaves most of us feeling abandoned. Your identity feels taken from you, and you find yourself feeling a sense of emptiness and fear. You can also feel exhausted and disconnected, as you push yourself through the wave of so many different emotions, trying to catch your breath and for just one second wishing you could feel normal again … knowing this is your new normal. It is a roller-coaster no one wants to ride, but we all find us there at one point and we want to scream “get me off of this thing,” but no one hears our voice.
And while I have experienced all of those, like many of you, the word that was repeated multiple times was love. LOVE. We cannot have grief without love. The other word that made my heart smile were gratitude for knowing and loving someone so incredible, for being chosen by that person, for sharing time and making memories. Grief is a journey, it is a road paved with uneven ground, but we can walk on it with grace…knowing that if we should fall, someone will be there to catch us. We need to be there for each other… we need to be the one with the outstretched hand so that no one walks that path alone.
“My memories say hello, they ask about you all the time.”
I am grateful to have memories. I wish I had more time… we always wish we had more time… but we did have time, and we were gifted them and they were gifted us and that is love, and that is why grief can be so hard.
Sending love to each of you….
xo
Gabby
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